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his small,little minah(NOT!) 
♥ ZURAIN;zoo-raa-intemasek poly; junior yr. pharmaceutical sci! :D :D SHORT,and happy with it.(: loud. laughs at every single little thing. chocolates,donuts and icecream make her smile like a kuku!:P loves her one,and only ♥ and oh, i am anti-veggies. ty (:
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Thursday, October 26, 2006
& its a feeling that has not happened to mesince so long now.. but why,now? why wen i just gotten my bloody god-awful results? it hurts so badly wen i saw it juz now.. its lyke being shot right into my heart yet nobody realised da pain i was suffering witnessing all these happening right in front of my very eyes.. so what can i do? i have no right..i dunt own him.. most importantly he doesnt know.. that makes it even more painful cause all i can do is watch..and suffer a lil bit more deep inside.. i felt lyke a lost lil kid watching my mother walking away from me in a crowded shopping centre.. their voices somehow grew louder & louder.. da sight was juz too much fer me to handle... it was al juz too much fer me to bear.. i tried pretending as iv its all normal.. i was goddamn hungry a min ago yet suddenly now, im not hungry at ALL. i lost my appetite. i lost my smile. & most imptantly,i began to lost myself.. da pain was juz all too much fer to bear. i couldnt take it so i went to da toilet & reflect on how stupid ive been dreaming bout him thinking he've always cared fer me and all.. ive been such a fool i thought as i looked at myself in da mirror.i couldnt believe that ive been in my fantasy all along..& i thought it was all so real.. i was wrong all along..i was never in his heart.. & i worried so much wen hes sick.. wtf was i thinking. wtf was i doing.. i guess my naivity is indeed killing me. this is wad happens wen i fuckin care too much i do such a fuckin thing and hurt myself so badly i fuckin hate myself so much.. haiz
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